No, I'm not going to tell you what I ate for dinner. Or breakfast. Or lunch...

But that's only cause I haven't eaten yet! Hehe..

I had the best fish and chips for dinner last night!!

I know, I'm incorrigible. ;)

I've been sick for this entire week and I only just woke up. Yes, it's 1:30 pm. I'm aware I went to sleep before 11 pm last night, and that means I've had 13 hours sleep. If you think I'm the laziest person ever, that is 2 nights of sleep cause I didn't sleep on Thursday, rushing a 1500 word essay on the Cold War. I only managed a 1/2 hour nap on my friend's shoulder yesterday. Hehe, and I keep telling myself that I won't procrastinate on the next assignment. Too bad I'm not even convincing.

Alright, I wrote 'Fall' because I know what it's like. I've been there, done that, and I know most people have too. So basically, I'm just conveying a story everyone knows. :) And if you read the comments, you'll know that no one is alone in this. I maintain that it's not wrong to want something you can't have. Aiks, I just deleted three lines I wrote cause those, boys and girls, belong in the next part and conclusion. I cannot be inspired to write now because I have to run off and take my antibiotics and brunch!

I'm a sick person, literally. :P

Kyels, don't worry about me. :) The story is not about how I feel at the moment. Even if I did, I think I'd be okay dealing with it (or not!) since I'm experienced. Hehe. For those of you who commented, shared your two cents, thank you so much. Because you're helping anyone on their computer who might've felt a little bit isolated before, but not anymore. Wah, I sound so pompous! Lol, but I'm being truthful when I say that. And you guys made me feel better! :)

Oh, and if you guys are after a chat, since my tagboard is not exactly e-mail central, or if you think that people glorify the convenience of e-mail so much when it isn't, add me on MSN. My e-mail add is lime_walk@hotmail.com

I can't do anything if you think MSN's overrated and you deleted it after 5 seconds either! ;)

Especially Kyels, Merv, Loong, Wanster, I hope to hear from you guys on MSN! Cause you guys have left comments here and I really like your blogs. *shy* Hehe, don't shy away!!

*Lots of hugs from a person with a cough and cold!*

... one day something happens.

You suddenly find yourself in tears when you remember that look of pain on his face as he reminisced of the times he spent with her. You find yourself wanting to punch the guy that cannot for the life of him treat her like the princess that she is. He has a death grip, refusing to let go of the past, and it's only hurting him more. Is she ever going to smile again, like she used to? You look in her eyes and they've lost their sparkle.

If only they knew that you were hurting as well.

You've held onto your thoughts and emotions for so long, you're at breaking point. But what can you do? It's never the right time. He's still a broken record, playing the same old song over and over. She won't take the exit even though the door's right in front of her. It's not for you to free him. You can't make her leave him.

Is this how it's going to be? Is it ever going to change?

You look at him. She smiles at you. You want him so badly. You've got to have her as yours. This lid you put on your feelings is breaking. It's all spilling out and you're not even going to try to stop it. You need to tell him. You can't keep it from her.

And you finally realise what you've gotten yourself into...

but can you not be so self-absorbed?!

*** For those who are completely lost here, PPS = Project Petaling Street.'

I know you love the attention. Yes, you want to be the first one to ping PPS. You want to announce your OMFGs or w00t!s to the world and how you think it all went. Or even just write two damn lines on who emerged the star. By all means, do so on your blog. That's not what I'm pissed off about. Being first is so important mah, right? *rolls eyes* You can be the CNN of the entertainment world. Faster than those online entertainment news sites. You're so the updated hor? Yeah, revel in it all. So proud of yourself, aren't you?

Well, I've had it with the way you go about it! You completely selfish brats!

If you don't mind, some people wanna watch TV shows in their own time, whether they're repeats or not. Make that most people, actually. We don't care that you know who won, who did well, who messed up, or who got eliminated because we want to find out for ourselves. It's like someone telling you who died in the Harry Potter book before you even laid your hands on a copy of it (everyone knew someone died so I'm not doing anyone injustice here =P). Or who got eliminated in the latest American Idol episode.

Or in my case, who won the Amazing Race. It doesn't matter that I'm supporting this pair, and I hope they win it (No, I didn't write who I'm supporting anywhere in my blog either). Sheesh!! I want to WATCH them win it! Cheer and scream at the idiot box! Curse all the other participants! That's the joy of shows with a similar concept. That's why most of us watch it: to watch someone succeed, or mess up.

So if you do ping PPS, be considerate. You can still be proud to be the first *rolls eyes again*, but STOP announcing who won/got eliminated/screwed up so badly in the title or the excerpt of your post. You wouldn't wanna find out that way, so why would you do that to other people?! I don't see why you should be so proud of yourself after you ruin it for someone else anyway. Keep it in the content. If we want to find out, we'll go to your blog. We don't need your announcement on PPS.

This has been a community service message. Because I believe it won't just benefit me.

It's a classic story. It's pathetic when you've lost count of how many times it's happened and you even begin to accept it as completely normal. We always want what we can't have. Do you understand now why Eve took that bite? Temptation. Natural attraction. And you know you can't help it.

Beautiful, isn't she? Will you ever forget that face? Those eyes? That voice? When you asked her 'how long will they let you stay?', you meant it. You really do think she fell from heaven to show mortals what beauty is.

And he's wonderful, isn't he? You thought you'd never find a guy who shares those values. Until you met him. That smile... have you ever seen anything so sincere? Will you ever feel that warmth again?

Maybe perfection doesn't exist. But you could swear that he or she really does embody it all. What can you do anyway? You discover something better than anything you could've expected, so obviously, you fall. Fall, fall, fall. Why wouldn't you hold onto him or her, even if it's only mentally? Who doesn't want to say that they have found that person who seems so perfect?

It's the physical attraction, what he or she believes in, your increased heart rate; they all make you want to hold onto the little things. When you see his favourite team's jersey. Her favourite song on the radio. A few words that remind you of him. A girl who looks just like her from the back.

You lose yourself, fall so deep, you can't see that it isn't going to happen. You pray he'll snap out of his single life. You hope she will turn to you one day, and say the magic words. You secretly curse that girl who called out to him and smiled so flirtatiously. You hate that guy that you saw giving her a hug, holding on for two seconds too long.

But you don't realise how far you've fallen. Until...

Ali called me last night. Normally, anytime we get in touch, it's because he's organising a party. But this time it was different. I think he needed to talk to someone so we met up for dinner. I don't know why but talking to him made me feel like I have lost my touch of talking to people and making them feel better. :(

As he was walking me to my bus-stop, I somehow began ranting on and on about where I live. I pay $200 a week, which is expensive by most standards, since I was told I can rent a studio apartment in the city with that money, but I don't mind forking over the money because I know the people I live with and the rent includes food and laundry. But it gets to me that I'm paying for broadband that is reduced to dial-up speed by the time it's the 10th of the month because we've exceeded the 10 GB download limit. I doubt if I've even used 1 GB!

Or that I'm paying for very few meals, because really, I eat out quite often, and dinner sometimes just doesn't get to me. Like the time I woke up from a nap and I was given a tiny bit of pasta because 'that's all that's left'. Those words, exactly. Or the time Ryan and Hayden were in charge of dinner and gave up on making mashed potatoes because they didn't boil them enough. There was the time when I didn't take a lot of something because I thought I'd leave some for Hayden and I was told to take more because he wouldn't leave some for me. I'm supposed to be living in a home, not a dog eat dog world. I say I don't mind that noisy fan in my room, but I actually do. I hate those bloody speakers that's been sitting in my cupboard forever. And I really am tired of using that fucking lamp, when the hell is the electrician coming to install a new fan and fix the light switch?!

Ryan ruffled some of my feathers because he accused me of hogging the Internet by watching videos or something. Obviously, I wasn't, so I got annoyed and told him to stop it. But he kept going and going and I started yelling at him. It's enough that everyone I ask pays less rent than I do. Or that a simple website now takes two whole minutes to load, what more blogs of people who love cam-whoring, thanks to those guys living in the garage who are in denial about how much they download (or they're bloody lying). Or that I sometimes get disconnected from MSN every 2 minutes. Or that I came home tonight when I didn't tell them I'd be eating out and they just assumed I would be, so they left nothing for me.

Looks like the possibility of me moving out next semester is getting bigger. I think I can buy my own groceries, cook my own dinner (or eat out with the money I save from my rent), throw my own shit in the washing machine, hang it out, not be told to throw out my shoe boxes (I really do think they come in handy) and use the Internet download quota all by myself.

Trinity, you coming, you coming??!

I called Max an alcoholic and he shot 'pot calling the kettle black' at me. I didn't realise I gave that impression to people! I just brushed it off. After all, it wasn't the first time we had discussed alcohol.

Then I realised he isn't the only one who thinks so!

Me: She really cannot drink. She's funny when she's drunk! I remember the time when she told me she's only 40% drunk. Lol.
Wan: You're trying to say you're hebat lah now.

Me: Yeah, I'm kinda sick.
Benji: Drink some more lah!
Me: WHAT! No, I haven't drank anything in over a week!
Benji: Didn't you go to the Colours party?
Me: No. I'm seventeen, remember? Anyway, I'm a good girl. I don't drink.
Benji: Yeah right.

Ryan: Man, I read your blog and it seems like you've drank more than me!

Me: I have phlegm and I'm eating chocolate.
Vincent: You should drink vodka.
Me: ??

I should stop talking about alcohol. It's gotten to the point that Max thinks I would actually pick alcohol over a regular drink (like coffee).

Refer to Not an alcoholic #2. Even if it somehow turned into my drinking log. =P

At first I wanted to kill Reina.
And Carragher.
But then I realised, they must be kicking themselves now.
And they were only trying to do their job.
Then I decided, oh, Reina's alright.
It's not his fault.
He emerged a complete star.

But not in my eyes.
He didn't manage to outshine Gerrard.
Hell no.
Gerrard showed me again why I think he rocks my socks off and I wanna have his babies.
Just kidding. Or not. ;)
Those amazing goals.
I know I didn't imagine the look of complete envy on Crouch's face.
I still don't like that man.
Pole.
Stick.
Stick-man?

Kewell was taken off too early.
Too bad.

By the 120th minute, everyone was dead.
Everyone seemed to want out.
So many dropped to the ground like swatted flies from cramps.
Hyypia looked like a bull restrained in front of a red sea.

And then kick, kick, kick.
Liverpool wins on penalty 3-1.

I really did feel for Ferdinand.
Chin up.
West Ham put up a strong fight.
My prediction of 1-0 was down the drain, but who cares?
The match rocked.

Now I'm going back to Dreamland.
Thanks to Wan who generously invited me to come over to watch the match and walked me home despite my protests.
... Do I come across as a helpless female?
Fine.
I want you to teach me how to tie knots (so I can tie the mean people up mah) and tell me which knife to buy, Vincent. :P