It's a classic story. It's pathetic when you've lost count of how many times it's happened and you even begin to accept it as completely normal. We always want what we can't have. Do you understand now why Eve took that bite? Temptation. Natural attraction. And you know you can't help it.

Beautiful, isn't she? Will you ever forget that face? Those eyes? That voice? When you asked her 'how long will they let you stay?', you meant it. You really do think she fell from heaven to show mortals what beauty is.

And he's wonderful, isn't he? You thought you'd never find a guy who shares those values. Until you met him. That smile... have you ever seen anything so sincere? Will you ever feel that warmth again?

Maybe perfection doesn't exist. But you could swear that he or she really does embody it all. What can you do anyway? You discover something better than anything you could've expected, so obviously, you fall. Fall, fall, fall. Why wouldn't you hold onto him or her, even if it's only mentally? Who doesn't want to say that they have found that person who seems so perfect?

It's the physical attraction, what he or she believes in, your increased heart rate; they all make you want to hold onto the little things. When you see his favourite team's jersey. Her favourite song on the radio. A few words that remind you of him. A girl who looks just like her from the back.

You lose yourself, fall so deep, you can't see that it isn't going to happen. You pray he'll snap out of his single life. You hope she will turn to you one day, and say the magic words. You secretly curse that girl who called out to him and smiled so flirtatiously. You hate that guy that you saw giving her a hug, holding on for two seconds too long.

But you don't realise how far you've fallen. Until...

Ali called me last night. Normally, anytime we get in touch, it's because he's organising a party. But this time it was different. I think he needed to talk to someone so we met up for dinner. I don't know why but talking to him made me feel like I have lost my touch of talking to people and making them feel better. :(

As he was walking me to my bus-stop, I somehow began ranting on and on about where I live. I pay $200 a week, which is expensive by most standards, since I was told I can rent a studio apartment in the city with that money, but I don't mind forking over the money because I know the people I live with and the rent includes food and laundry. But it gets to me that I'm paying for broadband that is reduced to dial-up speed by the time it's the 10th of the month because we've exceeded the 10 GB download limit. I doubt if I've even used 1 GB!

Or that I'm paying for very few meals, because really, I eat out quite often, and dinner sometimes just doesn't get to me. Like the time I woke up from a nap and I was given a tiny bit of pasta because 'that's all that's left'. Those words, exactly. Or the time Ryan and Hayden were in charge of dinner and gave up on making mashed potatoes because they didn't boil them enough. There was the time when I didn't take a lot of something because I thought I'd leave some for Hayden and I was told to take more because he wouldn't leave some for me. I'm supposed to be living in a home, not a dog eat dog world. I say I don't mind that noisy fan in my room, but I actually do. I hate those bloody speakers that's been sitting in my cupboard forever. And I really am tired of using that fucking lamp, when the hell is the electrician coming to install a new fan and fix the light switch?!

Ryan ruffled some of my feathers because he accused me of hogging the Internet by watching videos or something. Obviously, I wasn't, so I got annoyed and told him to stop it. But he kept going and going and I started yelling at him. It's enough that everyone I ask pays less rent than I do. Or that a simple website now takes two whole minutes to load, what more blogs of people who love cam-whoring, thanks to those guys living in the garage who are in denial about how much they download (or they're bloody lying). Or that I sometimes get disconnected from MSN every 2 minutes. Or that I came home tonight when I didn't tell them I'd be eating out and they just assumed I would be, so they left nothing for me.

Looks like the possibility of me moving out next semester is getting bigger. I think I can buy my own groceries, cook my own dinner (or eat out with the money I save from my rent), throw my own shit in the washing machine, hang it out, not be told to throw out my shoe boxes (I really do think they come in handy) and use the Internet download quota all by myself.

Trinity, you coming, you coming??!

I called Max an alcoholic and he shot 'pot calling the kettle black' at me. I didn't realise I gave that impression to people! I just brushed it off. After all, it wasn't the first time we had discussed alcohol.

Then I realised he isn't the only one who thinks so!

Me: She really cannot drink. She's funny when she's drunk! I remember the time when she told me she's only 40% drunk. Lol.
Wan: You're trying to say you're hebat lah now.

Me: Yeah, I'm kinda sick.
Benji: Drink some more lah!
Me: WHAT! No, I haven't drank anything in over a week!
Benji: Didn't you go to the Colours party?
Me: No. I'm seventeen, remember? Anyway, I'm a good girl. I don't drink.
Benji: Yeah right.

Ryan: Man, I read your blog and it seems like you've drank more than me!

Me: I have phlegm and I'm eating chocolate.
Vincent: You should drink vodka.
Me: ??

I should stop talking about alcohol. It's gotten to the point that Max thinks I would actually pick alcohol over a regular drink (like coffee).

Refer to Not an alcoholic #2. Even if it somehow turned into my drinking log. =P

At first I wanted to kill Reina.
And Carragher.
But then I realised, they must be kicking themselves now.
And they were only trying to do their job.
Then I decided, oh, Reina's alright.
It's not his fault.
He emerged a complete star.

But not in my eyes.
He didn't manage to outshine Gerrard.
Hell no.
Gerrard showed me again why I think he rocks my socks off and I wanna have his babies.
Just kidding. Or not. ;)
Those amazing goals.
I know I didn't imagine the look of complete envy on Crouch's face.
I still don't like that man.
Pole.
Stick.
Stick-man?

Kewell was taken off too early.
Too bad.

By the 120th minute, everyone was dead.
Everyone seemed to want out.
So many dropped to the ground like swatted flies from cramps.
Hyypia looked like a bull restrained in front of a red sea.

And then kick, kick, kick.
Liverpool wins on penalty 3-1.

I really did feel for Ferdinand.
Chin up.
West Ham put up a strong fight.
My prediction of 1-0 was down the drain, but who cares?
The match rocked.

Now I'm going back to Dreamland.
Thanks to Wan who generously invited me to come over to watch the match and walked me home despite my protests.
... Do I come across as a helpless female?
Fine.
I want you to teach me how to tie knots (so I can tie the mean people up mah) and tell me which knife to buy, Vincent. :P

I remember the good times I spent with my friends and the boarding staff at the reception area, just talking about anything and everything. The topic that day was how expensive things were.

Former boarding staff: Bras here are so expensive. The average one costs 20 bucks (not an exaggeration in the land down under). It's almost like it's a luxury item, not a necessity.

And I thought to myself, yeah, guys would love that declaration.

Maybe I just need to stop converting, but that's kinda hard to do when the income coming in (my father's :P) is in RM, not AUSD. If it was the reverse, then yes please. Imagine a Starbucks/Coffee Bean/San Francisco (whichever you think rocks your caffeine addiction) latte/cappucino/flat white/espresso/mocha (anything else is not caffeine), at only RM 4. The biggest size available, no less. Mmmm...

But then there's the undeniably too-bloody-expensive stuff. There's no way a bowl of Vietnamese noodles would cost RM 10 in a food court. HELL NO. Because noodles + beef = RM 10? No one would even touch it. Even chicken rice in the KLCC food court cost me 5 bucks at most. Drumstick. Sesame. Hello? A bottle of water at RM 2.20? You can rob a bank first.

I miss going to the mamak and just having a thosai and teh tarik. Grand total = RM 2.50 AT MOST. And I'm full. Over here, with AUSD 2.50, I can get.. hmm.. 1 1/2 chocolate bars. As much as I love chocolate, I don't think I could just eat it for lunch. All the dairy stuff stuck in my throat. I still need water to wash it down and yeah, tap water here is safe for consumption, but...

Just no.

Give me the overpriced Malaysian foodcourt anyday.

Well, bitching doesn't do any good. I'm still heading to Starbucks in an hour. :P

I wasn't going to blog today. After all, buying 3 items of clothing for $15 cannot interest more than half a person (I'm doing kindness to myself by not saying nobody). But then I visit Merv's.

Hehe, I'm not a killjoy!

I AM: me :)
I WANT: good grades, more cash, a massage. Yeahhhhhhh.. hehe.
I WISH: to visit London = Football, pubs, clubs, malt loaf, English accents.
I HATE: my procrastination skills. I'm a pro. :(
I MISS: the times in boarding school.
I FEAR: that one day, I'll screw uni up. Big time.
I HEAR: my housemates talking. Well duh, I live with six people.
I WONDER: if it's mutual.
I REGRET: a lot of things. I hate what stress can do to me.
I AM NOT: skinny, anorexic or bulimic. I love food too much to be any of those.
I DANCE: whenever there's good music.
I SING: emo songs that I assume people hear when they commit suicide.
I CRY: occasionally, like every normal person
I AM NOT ALWAYS: lazy, contrary to popular belief. Procrastinating is different from being lazy.
I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: you laugh. Hello, tickle lah.
I WRITE: in different handwritings all the time. I know, it's strange.
I CONFUSE: people. You think you get me and then I do a 180 and you go, WHAT!
I NEED: to stop drinking coffee. Well, I heard Red Bull works. :P
I SHOULD: stop skipping lectures even if he just reads the slides in that horrid monotone voice... On second thought, never mind.
I START: assignments the night before they're due.
I FINISH: assignments a few hours before they're due.
I LOVE: blogging.
I REMEMBER: random things, and especially things I don't want to remember/not worth remembering.

I TAG: anyone who has too much time on their hands wants to do this.

I always feel this sense of pride everytime I see/hear Malaysia mentioned in any of my lecture. Like today, my Political Science lecture was on multiculturalism, and the notes given to us stated that our government policy supports it. In our tutorial, I also told them about the way we hold open houses during ocassions like Hari Raya and CNY.

But the strangest mention of Malaysia I've come across is that Malaysians have the highest degree of respect and deference between superiors and subordinates. Do you think that's true? I mean, I don't really like my supervisor because of the way the system works. It's pure capitalisation; if you're standing behind the counter while there are no customers, do something. Make wasabi. Fill the fridge. Wipe the windows. Anything. If it's more than 30 seconds that you're standing there while there's no customers, and a supervisor spots you, you're dead.

But I actually understand that they're a business that employs plenty of casuals and temps, and therefore, they wouldn't be big on the whole communication among the team members, or any of those stuff based on motivation to increase sales. Their priority is sales, so she has to make sure that we're doing something that will maximise it at all times. I respect that she has to do a tough job, as much as I want to be tell her that I don't wanna work at all. =P

Lol, I wonder if it's true or false.

P/S: Austria has the lowest. Let's go, let's go! ;)